Sean Osborn - Mindset Coach, Podcaster, Author

Sean shares his journey from homelessness to a successful exit of his startup, the methodologies he uses to achieve maximum impact and the power of mentorship.

• "Once that switch hit, I knew my life was going to be the way I wanted it." - Sean Osborn
• "You've got to see outside of your current experiences to get where you want to be." 
• "Action builds clarity." 

Sean Osborn is a mindset strategist and coach who specializes in getting people to the next level. On his own at 15, Sean went from zero to starting a multi-million dollar tech company and managing high-level teams for some of the largest companies in the country by the age of 30.

Sean achieved these successes and many more in his life by studying and applying the timeless truths that have been passed down for centuries. As science and technology have advanced, they’ve removed the mystery from why these techniques work and helped Sean develop the You:OS Model, providing a clear road map to supercharging success for anyone who uses it.

Nowadays you will find him coaching, conducting masterminds and workshops, looking for the next great place to do a triathlon vacation, and playing with his granddaughter — all while teaching everything he knows about mindset, and growth through his Thinking Big Podcast.

http://thinkingbigcoaching.com/
https://www.facebook.com/sean.osborn1/
https://www.instagram.com/thinkingbigcoaching/

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Transcript

Jason Frazell: 0:11

guest on the show today is Sean Osborne. He is a coach. He's an author. He's a podcaster. He has become a friend of mine. We actually spent some time together. Wow. Only about 10 days ago. We got a chance to hang out and we're going to talk a little bit about that today. Sean, you and I have been talking about having you on my show for at least a year, and we've been talking about me coming on yours, and we're making it all happen all at once today here as we wrap up 2023. This is going to let you know a lot about Sean and I's personality. We like efficiency. Yes. Efficiency. We like efficiency. Sean, the first question, am I talking to you, or am I talking to an avatar right now? Or a DP?

Sean Osborn: 0:51

Both.

Jason Frazell: 0:54

It's a combination. You've combined them both. But no, seriously, Sean, so good to have you on today. Sean is We're going to talk about a variety of different things. Sean and I have had, in some ways, similar journeys in our corporate careers to doing our own thing, and in some ways, we Very different journeys. Shoshana, I'd like to open up by just having you share a little bit about yourself, anything you want the audience to know about you as we kick off here today.

Sean Osborn: 1:17

Yeah. So again Jason, thank you so much for having me on, on the show and yeah, we've been wanting to do this for a long time. We've been together doing Many things over the past couple of years with, you know, the mastermind groups and, and getting together and really being able to kind of grow up together over the past couple of years and in what we do. So yeah, so just a little bit about me. So my journey started probably a little bit different than most people. My journey started when I was 15 and I found myself homeless. I was on my own I was the, the, literally the poster child for don't do drugs. If you ever saw those posters back then, like don't do drugs. Yeah. That was

Jason Frazell: 1:54

with the, with it. And then the post, I mean, I was a dare kid. I'm 46. So I grew up in the dare world and grew up in the, Arguably the best commercial ever the fried egg in the pan. This is your brain. This is your brain on drugs

Sean Osborn: 2:06

amazing. Yeah So my brain is now just over easy over. Well, actually it's So, you know and that that's pretty much what my life was so that's what I saw as reality back then was very, very scarce. You know, my mindset was scarcity. It was very dim, very low. Obviously my self esteem was not very good and several key things happened back then. So again, I was on my own since 15. I, you know, since 15, I literally have not lived with my parents. I've been on my own. I've done my own thing.

Jason Frazell: 2:42

So Sean, just really quick. So at 15, You were on, you were on the street, you were on the streets doing your thing and then you're in and out of like shelters and things like that, so you were literally homeless at

Sean Osborn: 2:52

15. Yeah, and here's the thing, I never went to a shelter. I never went to a food bank. I don't know if I didn't understand that they existed. Yeah. Or I didn't want to know they existed. But I never did any of those. So it was like I was either on the street or I was trying to get a room with someone, a friend. I, at 15, I actually moved out of the state I was in. I was living in New Mexico and I actually moved to Omaha, Nebraska. So I got clean and I, and I knew to myself that. In order to stay clean, I had to get out of where I was. I at least had the, the, you know, the, the knowledge to say, I've got to leave that because I'd been through treatment once before, went back and it's like, okay, all the same shit, the same people got into the same stuff. So I moved to Omaha, Nebraska, knew nobody, nothing there. So didn't know people didn't know anything. It was really starting from ground ground zero. And there's not a lot of opportunities for a recovering drug addict. 15, you know, 16 year old kid to make a living. There's not a lot of opportunities there. And so I was trying, you know, I was washing dishes. I was doing all these things to try to survive, but there were times that I was, didn't have a place to stay. You know, I couldn't sign leases anywhere, so it was very tough to stay anywhere anyways. So yeah, it was several years of that. And then at 17, Somehow, see, and here's the thing, you know, that even though all the shit I was going through, I still had an it factor. I've, there was still something about me because somehow I still had an it factor because it's only gotten better over time. Obviously it's only gotten better. I've, I've fine tuned to it because somehow Amy, which is now my wife, you know, back, you know, back then, you know, she told me that once she said, yeah, to date me and it's like, she was way out of my league. She was just thinking about it. She was educated. She had a place to stay. It's like, Oh, she had a car. It's like, so she said yes to date me and, and. You know, I, I tend to like to make things difficult. So I of course got her pregnant. And so I'm 17.

Jason Frazell: 4:59

You're like, let me, let me take you down with me, Amy. We're going to go down. We're going

Sean Osborn: 5:03

to go down together. Hold my hand. Yeah. So got her pregnant and it was like, that was the scariest thing that has ever happened in my life. It's like that to me, that was when I actually hit like rock bottom. I'm like, Holy crap. How can I possibly bring a kid into this world? Look at, I am uneducated. I can barely survive on my own. I can't support myself let alone a family. You were clean

Jason Frazell: 5:25

though. You were clean. Yes, you were clean, but Not really a place to live hard to get a job. Yeah, not a great place to have a child. Yeah

Sean Osborn: 5:33

Yeah lived in a place that was living in places that yet No child should ever see let alone, you know Be involved with and that's really that was that for me the catalyst that said, okay Sean No one's coming here to save you. Nothing's gonna change unless you change Sean There's, there's no government programs. There's no one is coming to help you, Sean, you do this on your own. And literally from within that time at 17 till 28 at 28, I was in the process of taking my first high tech company public. So it's like those 10 years are the most special. for me, the most spectacular 10 years that I've had in my life. It's the most invigorating, the most thinking the most ideas. It was like a process of just nonstop growth during that timeframe. And, you know, I like to say that being on my own and homeless at 15 was probably the best thing that could ever happen to me. It was the biggest gift I've ever been given because it forced me to take responsibility for myself and to get things done and to do things that I could not, I could not have done. Had I stayed in school? Had I went through high school? I think one of the things that I gained from that is I got out of school in the ninth grade And that was about the time where to me people start getting programmed of what they can and can't do. So yeah, luckily, luckily I got out before Society said, Sean, you can't do some of the things that you were going to go do. You can't go talk to, you know, I was 22 years old and I was going and talking to, you know, billionaire, millionaire, venture capitalist saying you need to invest money in my company. You're, you're, you're an idiot if you don't invest a million bucks in, into my, my seed company. And again, I'm a nine That was,

Jason Frazell: 7:15

that was your actual, knowing you, that might be your actual pitch. You're an idiot

Sean Osborn: 7:18

if you don't do it. Yeah, I, oh, I, I absolutely see. That was, that was part of it's like, you're an idiot if you don't invest in my company. And it's like, so it's like, I was never programmed with what I can and can't do, which was to me, which was a gift that that I was given that cause now it's like you go through school. It's like, you can't do it. People tell me like, you can't do that. I'm like, well, I did. Yeah. You know, I did. You should do it. You just take action. You just go and do it. You know,

Jason Frazell: 7:45

Sean, I want to just offer something. I just, I just started listening to. Listening and reading to the Elon Musk biography by Walter Isaacson. He, he had something similar. I don't know if you, if you listen to it or read it. Where his father would tell him, You can't do this, you can't do that. His father was also very cruel, according to the book. Very cruel, very critical. Never said nice things and, I think this is a common experience. Like the output is different of 15 or drugs or, Like what Elon's doing now but, I think this is a common experience for people to have. I have a little bit of this in me, too. I, again, and we were talking about this before, is you and I have a very different path. I grew up in a great, great home. Parents are awesome. But, very limiting beliefs. And not really from them, just from myself, growing up in the Midwest. I grew up in the Midwest, too. Right? So, not Omaha, but Minnesota. It's like, yeah, you can't really do that. Here's what you can expect out of your life. And, I just want to say, I really admire Your tell, what is it you, I can't do again to tell, let me, let me make sure I get the details of that so that I can go do that specific

Sean Osborn: 8:55

thing. Exactly. I dare you to, to doubt me because I will, you tell me I can't do something. Guess what? I'm doing it.

Jason Frazell: 9:03

It's doing it. It's that simple.

Sean Osborn: 9:04

Yep. Yeah. And it's, so it was a, you know, it's a great time. And again, I think it goes back to if we take responsibility for the things that we, you know, of our life. You know, if we take responsibility, the good, the bad, it's like everything that happens to me, if I, if I'm driving to work and I get in an accident, that's my fault. You know what? I could have left five minutes earlier. I could, there's so many things I could have done to not be in that accident. So I might not have caused the accident, but it's my fault that I'm in that accident. And it's like, once you get to that level of taking full responsibility, things start changing.

Jason Frazell: 9:43

Sean, I want to ask you a question. I want to hear about the shift that you just mentioned from 15 homeless, moving 17 girlfriend pregnant, having a child to 28, selling your first tech company. Do you remember, was there a moment in time that you had to make a choice? Like you had to make a choice of I am going to change my mindset or was it more of a process for you over time? If you think back to those times, because that's a remarkable. That's a remarkable transformation. Like, was there, I guess my question really is, was there a specific moment that you know of, that had you go, Ooh, this is, this is it. Like, this is the thing.

Sean Osborn: 10:27

Yeah. And it, so, I, yeah, there was definitely the moment, and that was the moment that my son was born. The very second he was born. That's what, it was like, okay. Do or die. You got to do this now. So that was the very second that it that it happened. But what I teach and what I've learned since then is it doesn't have to be a life altering thing to get that clarity on what you want. Mine was a point where it's like you had to, there was no other choice. It was either you give up or you, you make the decision and you go. And it's like, but we don't have to be there. And that's the whole thing that, you know, part of what I teach is you can make the decision on what you want without hitting rock bottom, without having to make it without putting yourself in a situation where it is do or die, but in your mind, if you make, if you make your idea, your baby, your goal, your, this thing that you're trying to create as do or die, you're going to do it. It's like if my life that I want is a kid, and I treat it like a kid, I feed it, I nurture it, I do everything I can to grow that kid, it's the same thing. It is the exact same thing.

Jason Frazell: 11:35

Beautiful. So, you had, and by the way, I just want to call out from getting to know you, and Sean and I know each other, I think pretty well. Your son is extremely

Sean Osborn: 11:43

successful. He can't tell me what he does, but he's, He can't tell you, let's,

Jason Frazell: 11:49

yeah. He's doing something that's, that's really helpful for all of us in the United States.

Sean Osborn: 11:55

And, and I, he, he tells me, Dad, I'll have to kill you if I tell you what I do, but yeah, so he went and got his PhD in nuclear physics and, and, you know, does something.

Jason Frazell: 12:06

Oh, I don't know. I feel like he could probably do something, just a PhD in nuclear physics that, that I don't know. It doesn't seem that, it doesn't seem that complicated to me. No, that's great. Yeah. And, and, and. Looking now at him, and I know you and Amy, and also, you and Amy are married. So, your son's, your son's mother has been your wife for a long time. So looking at the life that you two built together. All started from that choice, when your son was born, because you were not married at the time. No. You had

Sean Osborn: 12:37

I was actually So, one of the things that I did, is probably the lowest thing I've ever done, was, when my, when she was five months pregnant, I, I said, you know what, fear took over. And, and again, fear can mean two things, F everything and run, or base everything and rise. And at the time, I said F everything and I ran. And I left. I literally disappeared in the middle of the night. And the day my son was born I knew it. It's like something inside me is like, Sean, your son's just born. So I went and called my called my then, you know, ex girlfriend, I guess you could say. I had, you know, left her when she was five months pregnant. She wasn't exactly too happy with me. So I went down to the What? Shocking! Isn't it shocking? So she wasn't too happy with Oh, but it gets better. So, again, I was Not doing very well financially. I was living in places that at least I was living in a place, but I didn't have phones. I didn't, you know, that costs money. I didn't have, there's no internet service. There's no cable TV. There's no phone. So I walked down to a pay phone and I call her collect. I hear the operator Amy, collect call from Sean Osborne. Do you accept? And I could just see her face. Just that

Jason Frazell: 13:45

am effort.

Sean Osborn: 13:48

But she said yes, for some reason she said yes, and it's like, it was literally that moment that, that did it, but yeah, it's,

Jason Frazell: 13:56

yeah, well, I think there's a valuable lesson there too, is being loved by that special someone when you're almost inarguably should be unlovable in that moment.

Sean Osborn: 14:06

Oh yeah, yeah. Like that's an,

Jason Frazell: 14:07

like, she had every right to say this, this person is unlovable, but she chose something different instead. So it's beautiful.

Sean Osborn: 14:14

Yeah, that's, so one thing she's. For some reason she's always been able to see something in me that I couldn't see so even back when I was you know 17 Yeah, I think that you know, that's why we're still married. It's got 36 years now. We're married 36 Yeah, seven years and we're married. It's like she saw something that that I never could Yeah. And I think we all need that. We, we need those people around us, whether it's, you know, a support group, whether it's family members or usually family members aren't the best, but you know, whether someone.

Jason Frazell: 14:44

A good boss. Yeah. Family members, arguably my, yeah, that's a two, that's a two way street. I would say.

Sean Osborn: 14:52

Yeah. Yeah. So it's a, you know, and the journey was a fantastic journey and I think the, one of the most interesting things that happened from. When I sold the company and literally why I do what I do today is for probably a good five years after I did that, I felt like a complete bake. I literally felt like Sean, that that's never gonna happen again to you. You were in the right place at the right time. You know, you didn't, I couldn't see. For years that I actually created all of that stuff. It was me. It was like I brought those things together. It was ideas that, you know, that I had working with people back then, which was a, you know, we didn't call it a mastermind, but I had a group of entrepreneur people that I really looked up to and I think I credit one of some of that to myself. Going back then I knew that I couldn't do it by myself And I so I had back then what I called silent mentors It's like I saw someone in business that I really admired and I befriended them. I did IT stuff for them I did things for them to get close to get in proximity of those people and became friends with them I never got money from but I learned I got the vibrations from them. I got their attitudes I got there, you know, I was able to get stuff from these people And that was one of the biggest gifts is like, again, to me, it's just like a mastermind. I got around people that were where I wanted to be. And I learned how I could pick up the energy. From what they have, I can act like if I acted like them, you know, one of my mentors was Jay Jean Claude and if I could act like Jean Claude, I could carry the same energy. I could literally walk in the room with the same energy as Jean Claude. And that's how I actually got venture capital for my company. It's like I used the acting of these people that I knew, like, what would JC do in this situation? He wouldn't come in scared. Yeah. He would come in and he would own that damn room, right? He would own it. Yeah. And it's like, so those are the things that I picked up from the people that I had for, I call them silent mentors or, you know, again, it's like a mastermind group, but that's, that's what I did. Very, that's amazing Sean. Yeah. So for years I felt like a fake and it's like, once I learned that it was something that I created. Yeah. That's something that is actually something that I did. That's what started the whole UOS, you know, the U operating system on how we operate to me, there's a way that our brain operates you know, through triggers and through associations. I mean, there's a scientific way that our brain operates. And if you know, the operating system. You can start using it to your advantage. You can put in whatever programs that you want. It's literally like downloading a new program to a phone. It's like, if I want to start doing this, if I want to start acting like Excel, well, I can download Excel and I can start operating Excel. And that's the whole UOS thing. It's like, and that's what really drove that. It's like, okay, if I did create it and it wasn't luck. Then how the hell did I do that? Cause people would ask me like, Sean, how, how do you go from literally homeless to selling a multimillion dollar tech company in 10 years? It's like, I don't know. You just do it. And it's like, so I really, you just do it. And so I really had to go back and re engineer from a mindset level on what it took to do that. And that's really what the UOS book is about is about how you reprogram yourself for success and whatever success means to you. You know, for me, success is being healthy. Being financially capable to do what I want and having the time, freedom to travel and be with whoever I want to be whenever I want to be there. Yeah. To me that, to me that is, is wealthy. Yeah. Not just

Jason Frazell: 18:30

money. No, absolutely. So I want to ask about, as we go into the UOS thing, getting present to it, I want to ask about the conscious versus the subconscious. If I'm not mistaken, and you probably have a better output GPT or both technology people is. I believe that the general science of neurology and brain neurology and brain science specifically is that we are conscious of about 5 percent of our brain and the other 95 percent is, is it's something along the lines of 5%, right?

Sean Osborn: 19:10

If that, I mean, it's, yeah. If

Jason Frazell: 19:11

that, yeah. It's, yeah. Obviously there's lots of, there's lots of studies on we only use 10 percent of our capacity, all of those things. And I'm talking about you and I are here. We are intentionally here. These choices that we're making, these conversations we're having is about 5%. And the other 95 percent of our brain at all times is doing its own thing.

Sean Osborn: 19:31

And it's actually a lot bigger than that. It's the difference is much bigger than that. And I don't have the actual data, but it's in, you know, to my book on how, how much data that our brains are processing, our brains, the conscious and subconscious. And the. Conscious, the subconscious mind is generating over a hundred, over a million percent more data than our conscious mind. So if I have a thumb drive, so if I have, let's say this is a thumb drive, right? And it took an entire lifetime to fill this with all my conscious data that I'm processing. I would be filling the same thing every minute. With my subconscious mind. So that's how much crazy going on back there. And to me, so for me, the subconscious mind is not a thing. It, it is you. It is. Every cell of your body is part of your subconscious. It's like, Mm-Hmm. They're operating on their own. For instance, have you ever been driving and almost in an accident and before you consciously knew what was going on, you had already hit your brakes and swerved. Sure. Yeah. That's your, that's your subconscious, which is in every cell of your body before you can even consciously say, Oh shit, something's about to happen. It's like, yeah, there's so much going on in our subconscious that we can't even fathom, but we can tap into and we can program it to do the things that we want to do. It's just, we talked about driving. It's just like when you first started driving a car, it was consciously tiring. Oh yeah. Like it was tiring to go, you know, drive I've got to shift gears, I've got to clutch, I've got, you know, brakes, I've got, you know, all these mirrors I've got. It was literally tiring. And within three or four months, you turn that entire program over to your subconscious mind. And there's days that you get to work and it's like, I don't remember even getting here. I don't remember how I got here. For sure. But you, you, you turn that over to your subconscious mind and it's very efficient at doing that kind of stuff. Yeah. So it's like, what can we turn over to our subconscious mind? So what are,

Jason Frazell: 21:23

what are some of the things? I'd like to hear from you and potentially what people listening, I'd love to hear specifically for you, what have you learned to turn over to your subconscious mind that was in the way for you before? And what are some other things with people that you've coached, people that you have taken to your programs have learned about themselves in terms of the UOS inside of the UOS container?

Sean Osborn: 21:50

So there's many things to, to look at as a general, just kind of a general thing. I am a big believer that. Thoughts become things and what we put out to the universe is what we get back, right? We get that back It's and again, we we've talked about this But you hear people like, you know Jim Rohn you become the average of the five people you hang out with or there's proximity and power all these people talk about this But that all goes back to being around those those people in that energy and I think that You can, there's things going on within us. One of the things that I talk about is mirror neurons. So if you want to get into out of the, the woo woo side of things and into the science type of things, there's science behind why we become the average of the people that we hang out with. Absolutely. Yeah. And we have these things called mirror neurons and. Anytime you are watching anybody or anything do anything, you are simultaneously reenacting that in your own, in your own nervous system, not, not just in your mind, in your nervous system is feeling it just as if you're the one doing it yourselves. Absolutely. You know, that's the science behind why getting around these people. is important. Your body is when, when you are around someone who experiences a great success, your body experiences it as if you just did that same success. Absolutely. So there's, there's science reasons why we want to, you know, that's neuroplasticity. It's like, there's reasons why we want to get around those people and do those things. That's just one reason why you know, the, the OS on, on how you start programming. to change, to make changes. You know, the first thing is get around people who who are where you want to be. You know, it's like, if you want to be a, you know, a, a chef at a, at a you know, Michelin star restaurant, cooking burgers out back with your buddy next door, you know, from an Oscar Meyer recipe is not going to get you where you want to go. You got to get around the people you got to get around other people who are doing that, you know, buy their books, watch their, you know, watch their videos, whatever it is, get around that energy. That's where you learn how to become a Michelin star chef. And it's not just the technique. It is literally the, the energy and the vibration of those people that makes them who they are. Yeah.

Jason Frazell: 24:05

Yeah. I love the concept of mirror neurons. We talk about this at one of the places I do a lot of training for in the really specifically in the context of communications, but. Mirror neurons are fascinating. According to the science that I've read, it's why we like horror movies and thriller movies. It's why we watch, I always use, I watch Tom Cruise jump off the Burj in, in Dubai. I don't want to do that. You might want to do that. I don't actually want to do that. But in, but in some part of our body, we feel like we're experiencing it. We see people doing these things. And how this relates back to, like, the five people, but also as communicators, as speakers. You go and you see a speaker who owns the stage. You are naturally going to feel more confident. If you think about it, this is a little bit of my soapbox, but I love this. Most of the time, when you go see a great speaker, or you take a great course, or you work with a great coach, Most people don't feel worse after doing that. They generally will feel better even if they go, they might, and I know, and I'm gonna speak just for myself here, I might go and see a keynote speaker, wow, they're so good. But I generally don't relate to myself as worse, I relate to myself as like, oh, I'm confident and how can I be as good? Not the opposite of that. The mirror neurons is a fascinating thing. We, we train on this, and do you know how they discovered mirror neurons? How the mirror neurons were discovered? Well, I,

Sean Osborn: 25:32

I don't know how they were discovered. I know that, that, you know, science is looking at them more from the standpoint of this is how we have empathy for people. I know this is, they've tied this back to, you know, when you feel when someone stubs their toe and you get that twitch, it's like you, you know, that's the mirror neurons, you know, in your, in your own neural network, you felt that just as if you had stubbed your own toe.

Jason Frazell: 25:53

The, the way that I research mirror neurons and for anybody listening, it's a great topic. In business, in sales, mirror neurons is huge in sales, like what's going on with your buyers, is that they did a study in Italy on monkeys, it was a humane study, monkeys were injured, but it was something about watching monkeys grab bananas, and then they took the bananas away and they started doing something and the monkeys still kept grabbing at imaginary bananas and what they came to discover is that mirror neurons, the concept is that mammals mimic the emotions of each other, and it can cross species. So, for anybody who has a dog You know that looking at a dog confidently can have that dog be confident, or like the dogs will give empathy. Dogs and cats are great examples of this, but I love the concept of mirror neurons, and it's, it's, when you walk around and know that that's happening, Subconsciously, that's a huge, that's a huge, I call that, that's a cheat code. Yeah. I mean this isn't neuro linguistic programming, a lot of it is about mere neurons.

Sean Osborn: 26:52

Yes, it is. And it's like, you know, and so one of the frameworks that I teach in, in the book is acting big. And that's kind of what I did when I went into these, you know, venture capitalists. It's like, I was acting big. I was matching their energy. And it was all in the book. Based on mirror neurons. It's all you know, it's it's learning how to Do that yourself to become that and so so here's like here's another thing that I would do One of the things I noticed is one of my mentors would always tip really big and smile Like we would go out to a business lunch and he would type it like a 50 percent tip and smile and I will You wouldn't say but it's like well, luckily I've got plenty of money Yeah, that's great. And, and, and I thought, okay, well, what if, what if I acted that way? So every time since then, every time I go out to dinner, I will always add a much bigger tip and think to myself, luckily I've got plenty of money and smile from a neurological standpoint. I've just used mirror neurons. I've just used, basically I've taken my own technology that I have and I've used it for me rather than against me. Now, had I said, God, 10 percent Oh, 20 percent who I'm literally sitting myself, setting myself up for scarcity. Yeah. From a, from a logical level, you're setting yourself up. So it's like, how can you act that energy rather than just, you know, people talk about, you know, doing affirmations and vision boards. Those are powerful, but when you actually act it and feel it in your nervous system it is a lot more powerful. And that's what, you know, and that's what that whole acting big framework does is it teaches you how to, and once you embody that, It becomes a part of you. That's how you reprogram your nervous system is by acting that way, taking the action. It's, it's a simple concept, but you're using mirror neurons and you're taking action and you're, you're literally not only seeing it, you're feeling it. And that's when that becomes very powerful.

Jason Frazell: 28:46

People listening, people listening to us today, leaders of people, people that are in obviously their own journey. That all sounds, and I talk to a lot of people, they go, that makes sense, intellectually. That sounds great, Sean, but I'm over here, and I'm just not feeling confident. I've gotten laid off, or I'm having challenges with X, Y, and Z. My challenge, not my challenge, my question for you, Sean, for everybody listening is, People, people intellectually get that. I think most people intellectually get this. But the block is, Either they don't know how, or they're just not feeling confident. So when you're coaching somebody and they come in, they go, Hey, I want to work with you. What's the first thing you have people do to start the journey to, I don't know if it's optimizing, but to really, I think everything that you do, and I think most coaches is our job is to help people achieve what they don't believe possible themselves generally. What's the first thing that you say to somebody, if I came to you and I said, Hey, Sean, I want to work with you. You know, it all sounds great. I really want to have an abundance mindset. I want all these things. But man, I'm just feeling, I'm just not in a good place. What's the first thing you have people do?

Sean Osborn: 30:02

Well, first I would say, Jason, here's a Kleenex. Take a moment. Yeah.

Jason Frazell: 30:06

Get it all out. Take a nap. Take a Kleenex. Take a nap. Come back.

Sean Osborn: 30:09

Get it all out. Get it all out. And then come back and we'll get this, we'll get this show started. So the biggest thing is we have to be able to see outside of our current experiences. And that is the hardest thing to do. It's like if you're in the mail room of a company, it's hard to try to look at the world like the CEO. If you are, you know, 350 pounds on a scale and you want to be, you know, 180 pounds, it's hard to envision healthy. You don't envision healthy, but until you envision those. You'll never gonna, you're never going to get them until you can see it in your mind. You're never going to have it in reality. It all starts with the mind. It all starts with ideas. It all starts with what's in here to get out there. So until you can envision outside of your current experiences, you won't get there. And so here's, here's an example. Let's say you're married and your relationship is not going well. That well, it's not bad, but it's not great. It's like, you know, when you come home from work, your wife's on the couch or whatever, and it's like, Hey, I'm home. And it's like, no love. Like she doesn't run up and jump in your arms and say, Oh my God, I'm so happy to see you. I'm how was your day? All this stuff. Right. You're going to, but if you, Set your mindset. If you started acting big and said, you know what, I'm going to come home as if I know my wife is going to run and jump in my arms, tell me how much she loves me. I guarantee you show up different. Your energy when you walk in the door is different. She might not do that. Right. But the energy show eventually that will happen. Right. When you show up that way, when you act differently, when you bring that energy to the table, when you walk through that door, she's going to notice the energy is different. You don't have to say anything. You don't have to do anything. But by Acting, you put on those glasses of my wife is gonna jump in my arms. She's gonna tell me how much she loves me How much she appreciates me Welcome home Whatever it is when you come home and you you bring that energy you act that person They will notice and it's like but until in it and it's hard to do that if that's not what's happening But you have to see outside of your current experiences. You said something

Jason Frazell: 32:18

there. It's really powerful and it struck me What what struck me is? You What you just described, you can't work your way into that. It's not a how to, it's not a, let me teach you a course. It is a something that, that is, that is an inside job. And it's action. And it's action, and it's an inside job, and you have to make a choice. The big thing there is, you have to make a choice. And I say this because, and I know you and I are aligned on, on like the coaching frameworks around, It's not really what you do, it's how you show up. You can't work your way into it, you can't, you can't outwork it. You can't, that's not a thing you can outwork, that's not a thing that you can put a six step framework to getting more of that, you just have to make a choice. Yeah. So I wanna go next into, what I'm getting curious about is the therapeutic side of this. I'm gonna get a little, hopefully get a little challenging conversation in a good way for both of us. Again, it all sounds great. We know that people come with all sorts of trauma and by trauma I mean they got fired from a job. They had a boss who was cruel. They had parents who were cruel. They've gone through divorce, whatever the thing is, and they show up and they say I'm ready to make a change. But they have past based trauma. Now we're talking about more therapeutic work. What's the, and, and for me, and I think you're an ethical coach as well, One of the things that you run into as a coach, and I don't know if you've worked with clients like this, I know I have, is you can't get past it. A lot of times it's a self worth thing. I'm not worthy of making that choice for myself. I'm not worthy of the love. How do you, how do you advise people listening who might identify with that, or clients you've worked with And they, they're not, they either are, it's not that they're unwilling to choose outside of their current circumstances. They literally don't know how because there's a therapeutic block there. Right.

Sean Osborn: 34:28

And that's kind of what I teach is how you get past that. But to start, one thing I always talk to my clients about is I'm here. from today, moving forward. I'm not here from today moving backwards. I'm not a psychologist. Yeah, it's therapy. That's not what I'm here for. So there, you, you might need both. There's, there's clients that's like, you need, you need to go to therapy and you need to get some of this stuff. You need to work through some of this stuff just for you, just to get, get past some of this stuff. So I'm here for moving forward today. And I can tell you that regardless of whether you believe you're worthy or not, you're not. If, even if it's for a minute a day, five minutes a day, you can act, that's the, that's the beautiful thing. And so here's where, here's where to me, the most important asset we have as a human being is our imagination, our creativity and imagination. This, that is what separates us from. Everything else, every other creature is, we have the ability to imagine. So if for five minutes a day, you can imagine what it would be like to not be, to, to be outside of your area, right? If you can just imagine it, get into that energy. That's all it takes. It's a slow, it's a slow process, but you that imagine what, what would it be like if you didn't have those limiting beliefs act as if, what would it look like? What would it be? What would it do? You know? And one of the things that I take people through is what I call remember your future. And it's like, you're going to build a memory of your future and it's an exercise I haven't go through that is so vivid. You know, everything that is going on in that day, the day it is, the what's, what it smells like. You're literally as if it was a memory of the past and you're building that. Wow. That's powerful.

Jason Frazell: 36:09

That's so cool. That's one of the, one of the things that President Obama, in one of his books, I don't remember what it was, Nate, not getting, there's nothing about politics here, but just, he's known, he's a very confident individual. He brings a lot of, a lot of gravitas. I think everybody would agree with that regardless. Yep. And I think one of the things they asked him is, How did you go from being a junior senator being the president and how, when you're in a room with these lifelong politicians, et cetera, and he was, what, 46 or whatever when he became president or something like that, he said, I had to act as if. That's exactly what it is. Act as if. That's powerful. Act as if I am the president or act, act as if I am that powerful leader who has to have tough conversations. And I will say from coaching a lot of folks who have are in pretty influential positions just like you do, that's what they do too. Yeah. Cause they come to my session. Well, they come to my session. They come to your session. They go, God, that felt horrible. I felt like a fraud. I felt like an imposter. Like you said. But I had to ask, act as if, which is such a powerful, such a powerful mindset to be is like, what would it be like if I was a podcaster with a million listeners for this episode? How would I run this episode different than how it's not? That's amazing.

Sean Osborn: 37:32

And it's like, when I would go to investors, that's exactly what I did because it took, it was trial and error. There was, I went to a lot of investors that did not give me money. Right. And that's when I came to, to learn it's like, they would feel my energy before I even sat down. It's like, they didn't even have to talk to me, right? They did not even, they knew before I even sat down and listen, I looked like I came out of GQ or Wolf of Wall Street. I mean, I had this, you know, 2, 000 suit that the Hartman briefcase, remember the Hartman back in the, that was the, that was the, that was the shit back then. All of them had a Hartman. So I had a Hartman. It's like, but they read my energy before I even sat down. It's like, until I learned to act as one of them until they saw me as an equal, they were never going to give me money for my company. Mirror neurons. Yeah. Until, you know, you have to act as if, and again, whether it's in your relationships, whether it's in, find out where you want to be and act as if that's what's already there. Your energy will shift.

Jason Frazell: 38:30

Yeah. That's cool, Sean. Well, let's talk about, I have a, I have a couple of get to know you questions here at the end. But before we do that. Just to give you, just to let everybody know what we're talking about. Sean is in the midst of writing his book on the U. O. S. Sean coaches people on these things today. The book is already inside of you. You're not inventing anything new. You're just getting out externally what's already, what you've been teaching people and coaching people on for years. Sean is also a prolific podcaster. He's got a Thinking Big podcast. And I want to talk for a minute about a couple of the things that you've done and that I really admire from a results perspective. Number one, you've grown a really big audience, both on your podcast and in your email list, in a space that a lot of people try and don't, and in a space where there are a lot of people who will teach you how to do it, and you have done it yourself. So let's talk a little bit about that. That's a really interesting topic because I, to me, this directly relates to what we just talked about, is Yes, there are some how to's, but my impression of you, Sean, this has all been a mindset thing for you. You decided to do these things. And it was a mindset. So let's talk a little bit about that before we wrap up for today.

Sean Osborn: 39:53

Sure. And it's like, so one of the things that I've done over the past couple years is I've built a very large subscriber list of people. My community, my followers, my family. I truly think of them as my family. And it's getting to be pretty large. I mean, it's over 100k. I mean, it's a large thing. And it's like people will ask me, okay, well, how did you build that list? And it's like, it goes back to the same thing that it's still the gift that keeps on giving from being homeless and being back where I was, because I look at it as like, I'm too stupid to fail. I, yeah, I'm just, I'm, I'm too stupid to fail. It's like, I talked to people now that the list is big and they're like, you don't just do that. How do you do that? And I'm like, and it goes back to, again, too stupid. It's like someone said, and I think it might've even been Mike, or it's actually a combination of people in my last company. It's like, I knew the way that I wanted to go is I had to have a big list to, To get my company where I want it to operate the way I wanted to do. And I just started building the list trial and error, doing things opt ins, free things. All I tried thousands of things to build the list and what works, what doesn't. And you just trial and error and you you get better at it and you, but it's all from taking action. It wasn't from reading a book on how to build, grow your list. It wasn't on a course. It wasn't on a, you know, it's just, Again, it's taking action. I didn't put a limit on myself saying, well, you, you shouldn't be able to grow a list that big. I never, never even crossed my mind that I shouldn't be able to grow a list and just trial and action, taking, taking the action to build it and growing from there. And that's how you, that's how you do anything. I really believe that's how you do anything. Yeah.

Jason Frazell: 41:32

Well, something you just mentioned there that is so powerful. And I have some of this, but not nearly as much as you, is you have a unique combination of things. You're unwilling, sorry, you're willing to iterate and test. So many people let perfection get in the way of progress. And you are willing to take action before you feel ready to do so. Before, before you're like, Oh, I'm feeling ready. No, you just go do it. And that combination is magic, in my opinion, whether it be in business, in life. It's magic. Anything we're doing, but especially in the kind of work we do where we're building our own thing. You just have to get out there and you just have to do it and you have to see what resonates. And there's so I feel bad because there's so many folks that I know that could be so much further along, myself included, if I just went out and did the thing that I know I should do, without worrying so much about how it makes me feel or whether it's good enough or not.

Sean Osborn: 42:31

Action builds clarity. I mean, people will come to me and they'll say, I don't know what to do. We'll start taking action. Cause you'll learn very quickly what you'll get the clarity on what you need to do. It's, it's all about taking a, you know, taking the action. And it's like, if I didn't do that, I would still be where I was. I'd still be on the streets. If I didn't just, if I waited until I was ready. Seriously, I would still be on the streets. I would never be ready. It's like people who are having kids. It's like, you're never ready to have kids. No, there's no manuals. There's no, it's trial and error. You know what? You have a kid and it's either going to survive or it's not. It's like your job is to, you know, so you learn quick. You iterate. You're like, Oh, this is how you change a diaper. Oh, this is how you do it. Yeah.

Jason Frazell: 43:16

It's been done billions and billions and billions and billions of times, and yet there's no actual manual for it, which is so fascinating. So, Sean, I want to ask you a couple of get to know you questions here. As we wrap. So the first one is I want to ask you what's something that you're afraid might be true

Sean Osborn: 43:31

about you. Ooh, afraid that I'm, oh, is this an X rated show or is this a,

Jason Frazell: 43:40

it can be explicit. Yes, absolutely. I think

Sean Osborn: 43:48

possibly that I might have the ability to do some of the things that people think I can do. And I think that, that, It scares me. It's like, I, again, it's that, it goes back to that you know, I don't think I'm very good at anything. It's like, I, I'm still, I always still picture myself as the smallest fish in the pond no matter what pond I'm in.

Jason Frazell: 44:06

Yeah. So then what do you do to compensate for that fear?

Sean Osborn: 44:12

Keep learning. I continually learn. I continually grow. I continually do things to push myself further and further. It's like, I, I'm never still with who I am. Always growing, always pushing. Yeah,

Jason Frazell: 44:27

I would, I would also say another thing that you do, my experience of you is you're constantly out to prove that you're not the small fish, but then you never accept, like it's like a constant cycle. And I mean this in a really positive way. I've asked, I've asked this question of 150 some people and everybody's got a way they compensate for that fear in the way they show up in the world. And it's really fascinating when you think about, I'll offer this to the audience. When you run into people that are really challenging in your life. Like Sean, for example. I'm kidding. I don't find Sean. I don't find I don't find Sean challenging. We're both Scorpio. So we see eye to eye. We understand. Variety of things. We, we understand each other. But it's like, hey, who's that person at work that's really triggering for you? And it just, they just feel like an asshole. Like, hey, like, what are they compensating for? Cause they're compensating for something. So I offer that as, as just for everybody listening, like who that person might be. And. The grace, the grace to be like, oh yeah, I, I, my operating system back to the OS works this way because of this and you knowing that is powerful because you go, hey, that's I get positive outcomes. I want to keep using that thing, even though it comes from a place that maybe isn't considered perfect or whatever. And then this, so the second question, the last question I have for you is, how do you see the world?

Sean Osborn: 45:47

As wide open, fully abundant for anybody and everybody to take whatever the hell they want. There is absolutely no scarcity. It is, there is, it is ever changing, ever growing, more abundant than we could ever even imagine. Whatever you can dream or whatever you, whatever you want, whatever your success is, it's there. It's there. Just get it. Just take the action and get it. It's like, there's no scarcity. It's 100 percent open and abundant.

Jason Frazell: 46:17

So if you think back to 17 year old Sean, or 15 year old Sean, still, still in drugs, leave home, can you imagine, could you have imagined yourself sitting at a podcast with a bunch of people listening and saying that as a worldview?

Sean Osborn: 46:32

Yes. And I say that because once that switch hit, I knew not, obviously not a podcast, not that stuff, but I knew, I knew for a fact that once I made that decision that my life was going to be the way I wanted it. And until we see it in our eye and our mind, we'll never have it. So you've got to be there before that. No, it was very limiting, very, very scarce, very very much a screw you. I'll get what I, I'm going to take what I can take. Because that's kind of the environment I grew up in. It's like, you know, it's, it's a, it's a do or die. It's you're in, this is an all for you world. And I'm going to get whatever I can go and scavenge and get. And when I take something from, if I get something of value, that's because I took it away from you, Jason.

Jason Frazell: 47:19

Yeah. So like literally scarce, like they're not an abundance mindset of like, if I want something, it's there. Well, Sean, I want to thank you so much for being on, for sharing a little bit of your, a lot of your story with us for your vulnerability. for the work you're doing in the world. Can't wait for your book to come out so I can read it. I know it's, it's on the way. Keep doing the good things in your podcast. Appreciate your friendship, brother. And just, Really fortunate to have you on today.

Sean Osborn: 47:44

Thank you so much. It was amazing. Thank you so much for for having me on the show.

47:49

Thanks for listening to another episode of Talking to Cool People with Jason Frizzell. If you enjoyed today's episode, please tell your friends, follow us on Instagram and Facebook, and give us a shout out, or take a moment to leave a review on iTunes. If something from today's episode piqued your interest and you'd like to connect, email us at podcast at jasonfrizzell. com. We love hearing from our listeners because you're cool people too.